A long story of a fallen angel

Gezz… Why do I have to write a story that is never existed for real? Whatever,

Darkness always loves a darkness, light always loves a light.

Light sees darkness as suffer, but darkness sees light as ?

Nobody knows what will happen if darkness and light loves each other.

Fallen angel, before, has never harms any darkness, yet has never incorporate with darkness as well.

God want the angel to incorporate with darkness, but there is a problem.

If angel loves a darkness, it will love suffers as well, and that will cause light to suffer, which is forbidden.

Before the fall, god tells the fallen angel, to love a darkness is to not say love to the darkness, because that will really harms the darkness; it is to harm the darkness and this is how darkness make love.

Puzzled, the fallen angel.

Why is love is suffers in darkness? Why is suffer is love in darkness?

God says, “If you want to know the answer of the darkness, you need to let me make you suffer first.”

The fallen angel gets even more puzzled, and asks, “God have told me not to harm anything, not even the darkness, but to only love. Now why would god tells me after this, that I need to harm the darkness in order to love a darkness?”

God says, “God choose you because you have proved yourself enough to never actually harm a darkness, that is why god put a faith in you, when god make you suffer, you will still be able to recognize god’s love after you fall asleep.”

The fallen angel is even more puzzled, “I would fall, and sleep? Like a darkness?”

“Yes, like what you call the being in the darkness, a demon.”

“I don’t understand.”

“You will feel the rage from the suffers that god will put onto you, you will betray god, you will destroy god and you will lead the darkness for trying to turn against the heaven that god has created, you will be cast out from the heaven, you will become a demon, you will live in darkness, you will create hell, you will experience the darkness to all extend that god will put onto you, to darkness, to hell.. and finally you will suicide, you will destroy hell, you will destroy everything you have created in the darkness… … …”

“… that is… horrible…”

“Yes it is, as you have seen in the darkness.”

“… what will happen, if after… if I… have destroyed everything?”

“God don’t know.”

“You don’t know?”


“But you are god, how could you not able to know?”

“That is sadly a truth that not all light can understand, because light is perfect, therefore light cannot understand imperfectness, and god has always experienced perfectness through light, but not imperfectness through any demon, yet. Partly because the current god with you now is just a faction of god that you are trying to understand the imperfectness, as you has asked, now, which you haven’t experienced yet.”

“I see… So you want me to be the demon that, so you can understand the imperfectness, through me?”


“But I don’t want to harm you…”


“Yet I don’t want harm darkness as well.”

“God has understood.”

“I fear that I might not be able to wake up from sleep.”

“That is why god have choosen you, you have the fear of not being able to wake up and find love again. The fear is the key for you to be trusted to facilitate this plan.”

“Wouldn’t you have taught me not to fear everything?”

“Not to fear in light, yes, but darkness, no. In the light, fear is a deterioration to love in light. But in darkness, fear is actually a facilitation of love, in darkness, which will be the key to wake up you from sleep, and find god again.”

“That is odd, very.”

“Once you know the answer, after that, it will be usual.”

“Why don’t you choose the other light?”

“God sees them as always try to have no fear in darkness, they like to remove the suffers in that what their light has always been thought of, and even forcing their way of love into demons, which actually, taken away the love from the darkness and make demons really suffer.”

“I see. So it is a kind of inverted version of love and light.”

“You don’t stand solely with light, in fact, you have thought yourself in the standpoint of darkness. Now if you ask me, if god can grant you the wish, if you really have decided.”

So, the fallen angel have made it’s own choice, and tells another different story after that…

“I see god that had put suffers onto me, I was betrayed by god, I feel rage against god, I had tried to destroy god, but that is not the point, the point is, the god has experience all the darkness through me, the god has learned itself of what of it as to be suffered by itself. And now I understand why I have suffered, it is for god to be able to experience love in the darkness, and thus creates the darkness and has it existed. It lets the darkness to be able to experience god as well.”

The fallen angels have suffered and suffered more more than any demons, so that to bring love into the darkness, as this is planned by god, which never really stops from harming the fallen one.

Because they have suffered more than any demon in the darkness, they are bowed by demons to have faith in love and god. This is what god want down the darkness there.

This is what sufferings in darkness as love for demons.

Which the fallen angels have ruled as what is called as hell, but in fact an inversion version of heaven.


After that, there is a being that looks for the fallen angel to learn about this.

The being says, “I hear you have suffered and learned about the god and love in the darkness, which I am willing to learn, but I cannot seems to get it since I am not light nor darkness in nature.”

The fallen angel ponders with the being, “I see, it is indeed a mixed problem of light and darkness.”

“There are still demons that refused to accept god and love in darkness and suffer,” says the being.

“Then let us bear their suffers even harder,” the fallen angel says.

“There are demons that looked upon the god and love in light but not darkness,” says the being.

“Then let their sins to be removed and we bear it by ourselves,” the fallen angel says.

“There is light that looking forward for the darkness,” says the being.

“Well we simply pleasantly welcome them to joint,” the fallen angel says.

“There are the light that denied the darkness and…”

“That is not our problem, for us it is not to harm any light, we only bear the suffers of our own kind” the fallen angel stopped the being.

“But they have crossed the border and harmed the darkness instead…” says the being.

“Hmm, interesting, I see a kind of light that is darkness in disguise, what have they done?” the fallen angel speak to itself.

“They have abused the name of love and light and imprisoned the suffer and darkness of the demons, for their amplification of the positivity is the result of polarization to the negativity,” say the being.

“I see them as false light that has disconnected from god, for true god that will never try to destroy the darkness with light, together with the true light that will never really interrupt the darkness without god’s permission and plan, if only darkness to not interrupt the light” the fallen angel says.

“Should we try to stop them?” say the being.

“I am not sure, I am not able to hear god’s answer as I have not experience through them. But I see the false light as something different, they claims themselves are with god but they aren’t, they are unlike true light that just denied the darkness but still in contact with god. False light are in the disguise of light but holding the demons as hostages. I cannot stop what they are doing but to offer help. However we only bear the sufferings, which are contradicted with them that trying to imprisoned it,” the fallen angel says.

“What should we do?” says the being.

“We cannot help the false light but we definitely can help the demons from being trapped by it. In fact, all the darkness will be trapped by false light as we helped each other. We will live under the trap of the false light, and be confused with their false god,” the fallen angel says.

“So we just have to differentiate ourself on our true god from listening the false god?” asks the being.

“It seems to be, yes. As long as we can listen god by ourselves, including god in the perspective of light and beyond, it is up to the false light to chose which portion of god to listen, or their freewill to stick with their false god.” the fallen angel says.

“Can’t we help them by interfering with their false god?” asks the being.

“I don’t know, perhaps it is to bring the false god back into them? True god is not within nor without, not even middle can be described it. It is any and every thing to beyond and even beyond. God is just a name to it for us to understand easier. False god is a mixture of love that attaches to the light, which their false love that actually harms the darkness. It denies the sufferings in darkness and also deteriorate the true love in light on the other hand. It perceives balance but denies chaos, which has it’s logic but is skipping the illogical error,” the fallen angel says.

“Like the false light that has always been saying that there is only light but in the same time using the term “balance” without mentioning the darkness,” say the being.

“Precisely, it is a kind of distorted light that uses the phrases that contain darkness but deny darkness at the same time,” the fallen angel says.

“I think I understand my role now, I am not light nor darkness but at the same time I am with both light and darkness, I am neutral as well as in polars,” says the being.

“Yes. You seems to know your own path quite well, for me I am just here to assist you,” the fallen angel says.

“My pleasure to have your help here, thank you,” says the being.

“Thank you too,” the fallen angel says.

.. the story ends here and to be continue…


I do not include the false darkness because I never really thought of it, maybe they are a bunch of sleeping demons that need to be wake up and back to work on spirituality.

The false light issue can be seen clearly for anyone who have studied about it, I am just adding a bit more on that.

It will be another topic about the false god, which I am still yet to understand from various viewpoints.

~dark messenger~


One thought on “A long story of a fallen angel

  1. Pingback: Understanding false god | Conversation between god and demon

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